by Megan Weaver
If you’ve ever attended a funeral, you know agony seeps into your very bones as loved ones grieve. Words seem both futile and elusive.
Now imagine going to a funeral and a wedding on the same day. The contrast does not take away from the intensity of either one. Both deserve your attention and your heartfelt emotions.
Although you may not have attended a wedding and funeral on the same day, I think most people have had, at some point, what I call “emotional whiplash,” when their emotions hardly have time to settle from one extreme experience before they’re forced into another.
At Care Net, our dedicated staff regularly and willingly take on this exhausting task. Advocating for life is not for the faint of heart. We go into spiritual battle with the full armor of God. We do not wrestle against flesh and blood. Let me illustrate based on a real day at Care Net.
Tensions were high as a mother and her teenage daughter arrived at our center. The mom was agitated and determined to get the ultrasound over with so they could move forward with an abortion. The teenager tried to ignore the reality of her own pregnancy. She stared at her phone or the floor while her mom spoke pointedly. “We want an abortion. You’re not changing our minds. We already know where we’re going, in Chicago.”
We worked through heavy conversations about abortion risks and potential complications, their circumstances and other things. We discussed how abortion might affect her later, both physically and emotionally. I explained the importance of testing for sexually transmitted infections. We talked about informed consent. We discussed adoption, support and community resources.
The ultrasound showed she was nearly 20 weeks along. It showed everything.
Even after this revelation, I felt nothing I said mattered. I laid out the support Care Net could offer if they chose life. I urged them to weigh the decision carefully. I must be vague here, but there was nothing vague about the life and death spiritual battle in that room. We will follow up, but I know we may never hear from them again. I could only plant seeds, and each interaction, each moment, mattered.
As they left, another client was waiting. I grabbed my clipboard, swapped client files and joined the next couple in another room. Less than one minute after leaving the previous appointment, I was face to face with a young lady and her fiancé, asking them, “Sooo . . . have you told your families?” They had considered abortion but had already decided to choose life. The ultrasound showed the baby’s strong heartbeat. They were so excited. We talked about parenting classes, baby showers and diapers. I gave them things for the baby and they allowed me to pray for them.
All this happened before lunch. Meanwhile, text messages told me my own children needed my care and attention. As the microwave heated my lunch, I sighed deeply and quietly asked the God of all comfort, wisdom and grace to guide and sustain me.
Where is the time to process all of this? The emotional whiplash aches long after clients leave the building. The waves crash and close in all around us. Advocacy is a vital position and central to our mission at Care Net, but it is a heart-wrenching role nonetheless. Please pray for our client-facing staff.
After five-plus years as director of our Cold Spring Medical Clinic, Megan became Care Net’s Donor Advancement Officer in mid-June. Her new role requires fewer hours and offers her greater flexibility to meet the needs of her four young children.